The potted palm trees are ganging up on me. My new work has lots of palm trees. I thought this was a good thing. I was wrong. They look over my shoulder when I’m using the photocopier. They rearrange my post-it notes. They lower my computer chair. They send rude emails from my account. I can’t prove any of this, but I know its them. And don’t bother suggesting that ‘Dave’s just having another vegetable paranoia attack’. The Bangalow Palm (archontophoenix cunninghamiana) is the worst. Its just wainting for me to make a mistake and then its going to tell everyone, and make things difficult for me. I can tell because it is being hyper-critical of everything I do. The battle of wits is not over yet.