For those of you who don’t know, I have a goatee most of the time. True it is a rather pathetic and ill kept goatee which I blame of genetics and a lack of good manly facial hair, but it is a goatee. A few days ago I worked out why I wear it. If one day I’m walking down the street (like one does) and I meet myself from a parallel dimension I will know straight away that I’m the evil one, which will make any adventures that follow a lot more fun. From this knowledge I draw a calming sense of certainty, certainty in an unlikely event, but that seems to be the only sort of certainty we can hope for.